Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
