the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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