You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize