My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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