how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
