Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
she looked like the before picture.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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