My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
