so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
