Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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