remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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