how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
