So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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