If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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