Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
