i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
