Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
