Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
