508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
