You work out of a Hotel?
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Randomize
