So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
barbara walters just said penis...
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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