Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
