Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
ok first of all what the fuck
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
