He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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