Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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