he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
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