Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
