rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
