i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
