conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
