There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
