"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
