"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
