I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
