she looked like the bat from fern gully.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Well I just put wine in my tea
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
