you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
