The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize