So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
