Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
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