just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
