At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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