Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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