hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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