This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
