Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
