We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
