when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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