Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
