So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Randomize
