when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize