It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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