I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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